Okay, if you know me, you know I'm not the type who tends to freak out all the time. Nor am I the type to be afraid of much. But as the summer slowly creeps on, I have less and less to occupy my idle mind; therefore, I tend to over-think and over-analyze everything even more that I already do. This all leads to worrying and my worrying has spawned fear. And this evil spawn cuts away at my brain, and the wounds there fester and become the breeding grounds for another enemy--doubt. And this doubt consumes my consciousness and has seeped into my dreams as well, spreading like wildfire. I am really uncertain right now.
I wonder if I'm making the right decision. I wonder if going so far away from everything I know is the right thing. I wonder if I'll make friends that I like as much as my friends now. I worry that I will not make as good of friends but at the same time I worry that I will lose touch with the friends I have now, the best friends I have ever known. I think sometimes my friends know me better than myself--urging me to actually consider law school because they know I'll actually like it--telling me to have more faith in my abilities--and even just knowing what I'm going to say before I say it. I don't think that was completely coherent but the point is I'm afraid of losing the close friendships I have now. I am afraid of failing. I am afraid that I'm not going to like the path I have chosen. I am afraid of the unknown.
I'm just hoping everything turns out alright.
2 comments:
Ready for some cheesiness?
Distance only makes the heart grow fonder. Moving away from your friends will not only allow you to appreciate them more, but visa-versa.
Plus, everyone is going to want to stay in contact with you Kayleigh. One of us is bound to do something illegal at some point in our lives :)
Can't wait to hear stories from Malibu!! I might need to come visit you; I fear my skin might actually blind someone one day.
I think you will be marvelous! I've never known you to not excell at whatever you tackle. Besides, Kim and I have saying for YEARS that you would make a great lawyer; it's about time you listened to us!!
The fear of drifting away from those wonderful friendships you have now is natural. However, if you are determined enough, you won't let the relationships fade. Long distance friendships can be hard, but are doable. Remember, email is a beautiful thing!!!
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